relationships

What would you do? Part II

The last entry was actually half done and I accidentally posted it up. But Kamm has already commented on it [thanks Kamm], so I’ll leave it as is and continue where I stopped…

….Apparently, according to Far1dz’s senior colleague, this guy’s marriage is on the rocks. Yeah, well, every guy has a sob story to tell especially when they’re looking for someone new. “My wife doesn’t understand me etc etc”. Sure…

But he still stays with his family. He probably still sleeps with his wife. I don’t know this for sure… I’m just talking crap… anyway whether or not he sleeps with her is none of my business.

What I’m trying to say is we all have a choice. As adults we ought to make responsible choices. Of course, having an affair is also a choice but it’s an irresponsible one. So stay or leave, not stay and cheat!

Whenever I speak about this, I am reminded of a guy in the office.

He admitted to me a while back, out of the blue mind you, that his marriage is failing and he was filing for a divorce. The only thing that stopped him from doing it sooner was the fact that his wife was expecting their third child, a girl. They’ve always wanted a girl so her birth recently was a bittersweet experience for him. Everyone was hoping for him and wifey to patch things up but he doesn’t see that happening.

I respect this guy because he chose to get out of a dyeing relationship. It must have been a hard decision to make – to leave his young boys and pregnant wife and move out of the house – but he stuck by it. But he still did his duties as a husband. He accompanied her to perform umrah last year because he felt that a married woman should go to there accompanied by her husband.

Some people, including my husband, believes that a divorce destroys children. Stay for the sake of the children, they say.

I think that’s BS. I say staying under one roof with a spouse you no longer love for the children’s sake is more damaging to the kids. Staying apart without actually divorcing is just plain dumb. Staying in a failed marriage and having an affair is just downright irresponsible.

I spoke to my colleague Je*han and she said that if ever her marriage came to that, she prays that someone would give her a slap and tell her to get out of the whole mess. If my marriage fails, I hope someone would do that to me too.

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