Disclaimer: One of those cryptic posts again. This is my view. You may not necessarily agree with it but it’s mine nevertheless. The least you can do is read and ponder on it.
You can find wisdom in odd places. For me, it was in a print advertisement for a cigarette brand in a woman’s magazine a few years back.
The ad said: “Don’t ruin an apology with an excuse”.
Recent events have proven this nugget of wisdom to be true.
When you’re saying sorry, don’t ruin the effect with “But I did it because….”
You’ve made the mistake. Own up to it. Don’t point your finger at others. If we all continue to blame our parents for everything bad which has happened in our lives, then there will be no end. Our parents are not perfect. They are human too.
No more excuses. Who cares if you didn’t get enough love from your parents when you were growing up? No one. And don’t bore people with your sad life story. You’re an adult. Deal with your own problems yourself.
Here are other nuggets of wisdoms which I had gained in the last few weeks:
- Before you put the blame on other people, look into the mirror and ask yourself (honestly), “Is it their fault or is it really all yours?”
People can tell you lots of things. If you let them, they can sway your judgment. But ultimately, YOU are in control of how you react to the situation. If you had made the wrong decision, you can blame other people all you want. But let’s not kid ourselves. You know deep down inside you only have yourself to blame.
- Live in the reality, not the little fantasy inside your little head
A little fantasy is nice. That perfect life with that perfect someone. But fantasy is just that, a fantasy. It’s not real. In your fantasy, you live happily ever after with her. In reality, she doesn’t even want to have anything to do with you. Some people choose to stay a little longer in their fantasy because reality is too hard to deal with. But there’s a danger in living too much in your fantasy. Because after a while, the lines between fantasy and what is real becomes blurred and you confuse between the two.
That’s when you start seeing things the way you want to see it. That’s when blue becomes black because that’s what you wish it to be. That’s when you convince yourself that all the problems in your life stem from other people and never from yourself. I mean, how is it possible when your life is so perfect? Oh wait, that’s your fantasy. You can hardly tell the difference now — fantasy and reality.
- Rejection’s a bitch, deal with it
Sure, you can try again until what you covet is yours? But will you really feel good about the idea of being accepted by someone who had rejected you before? That you are always going to be second or third or fourth best?
So that’s why sometimes it’s better to accept rejection with humility. Like McCane and his defeat to Obama. Know your place, you were not wanted. But also know that one day — not your beloved, but — someone else will accept you as his or her first choice. You wouldn’t even have to fight for it. Now isn’t that much nicer?
